ON THE ROAD TO HEALING

Your life is a gift

And do not under estimate the importance of those you meet along life’s part.

Minka okim

In this piece, I intend to write about an extract I got from the writer Elizabeth Gilbert in her book Eat, Pray, Love. A love story about a woman who found peace, certainty and a healthy relationship 

 with God after her divorce. 

 Relationships are very important to the core of who we are. We may exist for different purposes which seems extremely profitable to our importance and differences. But one thing cannot be overlooked and that is through cordial relationships our happiness is possibly determined. The whole story about relationships in this piece would build on our quest for intimacy with the opposite sex and moving on when life turns the door knob on our expectations. As time grows through years and months, we grow to yearn for more from the usual normal affections to a deeper and strategic commitment to one among a thousand folks. One very alarming but admirable reality that inspires my heart is the fact that out of a thousand folks lies just one object of our affection; strange but a very enriching fact.

 In Gilbert's Book Eat, Pray, Love, she encounters a heart wrecking divorce and moves on with a younger man who she gets into a relationship with, but as time hits the bell they separate because of some reasons you would get to know as I progress. After the breakup, she decides to undertake several trips around the world where she meets an older man in Rome who brings some light into her life. During the course of their friendship, the man explains the reason why people come into our lives. She tells him ‘The reason it is so hard to get over this guy is because I seriously thought he was my soul mate’.

Many people come into our lives because of certain reasons we may never understand and when they move away, we become emotionally sick. We all need to understand that some relationships happen because God needs to work on something in us through those people. God may have identified that you need a certain aspect of you exposed to healing and he works in some people into your life to help you healed. Please be sensitive in knowing what God is saying about people who come into your life.

The man Gilbert speaks to says something profound ‘Your problem is you don’t understand what the word ‘soulmate means’. People think a soul mate is your perfect fit and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soulmate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soulmate forever, Nah too painful. Soulmates they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. And thank God for it. Your problem is you just can’t let it go. Some people come into your life not because you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with them. It could be that you have something they need or they have something you need to go to the next level of your life and work with God. Be glad about great relationships like that and do not mourn longer than is expected when it ends. People may come into your life to shake you up, drive you out of your limitations that could have limited your gifts, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and additions, break your heart open so new light could get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you had to transform your life and then introduce you to God. This could be the job of the people who came into your life and left. Accept all that has happened and move on. Your life is a gift, do not waste it over spilled milk. Your emotions may get in the way initially but decide to move on. If you clear out all the space in your mind you’re using to obsess over your past relationships, you’ll have a vacuum there, an open spot- a door way; the universe will rush in, God would rush in and fill you with more love than you have ever dreamed of. Stop using your past relationships to block the door.

Regret is the rottenness of yesterday’s stench. Get up from where you are at the moment and move ahead. You may feel painful bolts of sadness, but gather strength and momentum from God and walk upon the circumstances in your life.

Love yourself enough to reach for the best.

THE CHASE

                                                   

The only traces of a life without impact is one who fails and never tries again.

Chase everything you really want out of life or else your failures would chase you.

In chasing your God given destiny, bad things may happen, but you’ve still got to keep chasing.

 

The prize of never giving up may not often be a Prize for a well written literature or an appraisal for something won; the only prize could be another well won failure. Despite those downward turns, never still give up on what is important to you. The beauty of something great is when it goes through toiling. The most important things you would ever have would take a lot of time to acquire, hence you may be tempted to give up. But still you shouldn’t. Put an extra effort and set new goals and plans you would get through it.

Below are short stories of people who never gave up:

Levi Strauss

Levi Strauss is referred to as the king of Denim. He is the guy who invented the jeans we put on today. Levi was just an immigrant from Bavarian who determinedly decided to make a living in America after moving from Germany to New York. Levi had two brothers named Jonas and Louis who were settled and later established their own wholesale dry goods company in New York. This inspired Levi to try out the dry goods business and he started learning what the business entails. In the light of the Gold Rush in California, he decided to move towards the west. This is when he started his own dry goods company. Through his company, he imported dry goods and sold them to small stores in California and throughout other towns.

In 1873, Levi became the owner of a patent alongside Jacob Davis. Jacob was a tailor who started making pants for working men-with metal rivets in places subject to stress, such as the corners of each pocket and the base of the fly. Because he could not afford to patents the pants alone, he solicited Levi’s help in paying for the paper work and suggested that they own the patent together. On May 20, 1873, the two received their patent for what they called ‘the waist overalls’, now known as the ‘Blue Jeans’.

Over the years, Levi’s business continued to expand remarkably and he wasn’t just referred to as a hardworking man but also as a kind hearted philanthropist who contributed large sums of money to local charities and in 1897, he funded twenty-eight scholarships to the university of Berkeley. To become anything meaningful, you’ve got to persevere in doing the things that brings you closer to where you intend to be. Things don’t just happen except through faith and hard work.

WILLIAMS WILBERFORCE

Williams Wilberforce is one of the world’s best-known champions of freedom and opponents of cruelty and injustice. He was the son of a wealthy merchant and a graduate of camp bridge university. Williams became a member of the parliament at 21yrs old. During this early age, he just enjoyed representing his constituency in parliament but he wasn’t pursuing any cause at this time. During the course of his life, he had an encounter with God that aligned him into the service of God. He was then torn between becoming a full time minister or a freedom fighter. Due to his passion for freedom fighting, he decided to serve God beyond the walls of the church. 

By 1787, Williams emerged as parliaments dominant voice against the slave trade. At that time, he had very few supporters because the wealth of the British empire depended on slave labor and Britain led the world in taking slaves from Africa and shipping them under horrific conditions to docks where they were sold like livestock to plantation owners and then forced into manual labor and often treated terribly.

Williams made up his mind to face whatever challenge was going to come his way. He said ‘Let the policy be what it might, let the consequences be what they would, ‘I am from this time determined that I would never rest until I have affected its abolition’. Great men are made in dire situations. A man isn’t great until he has fought the battles that wants to reduce him to nothing. Williams endured sickness, hardships, controversy and betrayals from colleagues but that did not stop him. He tirelessly fought the storms as there arrived. He presented his bill for the abolition of slave trade eighteen times before it finally passed.

In 1807, Williams finally saw the goal for which he had labored, sacrificed and endured criticism accomplished. Wilberforce died in 1833, knowing the end of slavery was imminent. One month after his death, the law abolishing slavery was enacted.

You may not have a calling such as the one Wilberforce had but you can serve God wherever you are and however you can. We were designed with different purposes in mind and can only become great in what God has called us to do individually. Identify what you have been called to do and grow into all that God wants you to become. 

OSCEOLA MCCARTHY

McCarthy was a woman who refused to give up on her dreams of helping others receive a benefit she never had. Much of life revolves around our ability to help someone else become better. The world may define greatness in terms of wealth, prosperity and affluence but Christ judgement of greatness is in one’s ability to serve others.

McCarthy was born in Mississippi in 1908 to a single mother. Her mother had to work long hours to meet the needs of young Osceola and herself; Osceola then began working at a young age and saved money she earned by ironing after school. Osceola had already decided she wanted money to help care for her grandmother in her old age, she also helped one of her aunts who had no children and was unable to walk after a long stay in the hospital. By the time her aunt improved enough for the young Osceola to go back to school, her classmates had gone beyond her so she decided not to go back to school.

So she started off a career in washing and ironing. As the years passed, she saved up all the monies she got from her business. She saved so much and decided not to buy a car, and didn’t stay in an air-conditioned room. As her savings grew significantly, her bankers encouraged her to let her money work for her, suggesting ways it would earn more interest than it did in savings account. She took their advice and her balances increased significantly.

Osceola’s hometown of Hattiesburg, Mississippi, is also home to one of the state’s universities- the university of Southern Mississippi. At one point, the school did not admit black students. By the time she was older they did- the woman with only a sixth grade education wanted to use her money to give deserving African American students in financial need the opportunity to receive a college degree. So in 1995, she donated $150,000 to the university and established to McCarthy scholarship. She said ‘I can’t do everything but I can do something to help somebody’.

You can turn adversity to something profitable as Osceola did. You can also turn a certain kind of Mystery into a great ministry. Nothing ever comes to pull you down, it comes to increase your value and strength.

In life you would meet a lot of setbacks and people who would live you but you’ve got to be very strong to keep moving. There would be sometimes that sickness and pain may decide to stand in your way, yet you can’t allow it define who you are and what you become. A great future awaits you if you’re resolute in developing your potentials and your gifts. God has given everyone gifts according to their abilities, when you develop them you become a star. In working on your gifts so many things may stand in your way like frustrations, disappointments and loss. All these things may look very tough, never mind them because it helps you develop tense muscles against pressure.

Remember that giving up is a tale of fools.

 

References

Never give up by Joyce Meyer